dear dorothy. advice column. www.dorothynada.com

 

 

I live in a small town and I’m the subject of a lot of gossip being spread by some other mothers in the same playgroup as me. They are saying that I am cheating on my husband. I don’t want the rumours to spread around more than they have already, but I don’t know what to do. Do you think I should confront them about it?

  J

 

Hi J,

Gossip is something that we, as women, are notorious for. There are few of us who can honestly say that we haven’t participated in a bit of “did you hear about…” or “apparently…”.

We gossip because it makes us feel better about our own lives.

There are a few things you can do to try and get a rein on these rumours.

Firstly, do you know the origin of the gossip? If you know the person who started the rumour, you could speak to them (calmly and privately, face to face) and ask them to explain the why behind their lie.

Next, you can talk to your closest friends and ask that they put a stop to any whisperings of the rumour that comes their way by simply stated “that’s not true” to anyone who talks to them about it.

Finally, and probably the hardest to do, ignore it. It will die down, but the more you talk about it (even to make sure that everyone knows its not true), the more these things grow. Paulo Coelho said:

“Don’t waste your time with explanations: people only hear what they want to hear.”

 

Bear in mind that the people who matter most to you wont believe the nasty rumour. This is one of those times that you will find out who your true friends are, which can be a real gift.

Love, dorothy. Advice column. www.dorothynada.com

 

Do you have a question you’d like to ask dorothy? E-mail them through to info@dorothynada.com

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Hi! I’m Leigh-ann, the face behind dorothy nada, and I’m a qualified counsellor with a background in individual teen, group, and family work specializing in addiction therapy. The advice and information given here is accurate to the best of my knowledge, but should not be taken in lieu of professional advice. I accept no responsibility for the actions of readers based on the advice given.

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